Sunday, April 17, 2011

A Grocery Story

Couponing has changed my grocery experience drastically.  I used to waltz in, buy what I needed and waltz out.  Most of me doesn't miss that.  I find myself wanting to tell people in the grocery store "if you just clipped the coupon out of the Sunday paper you would have paid .25 for that instead of $1.25!!" or "every time you throw away coupons you're throwing away free money!!"  Our meals are now planned around coupon and sale match-ups, and I've got so many fruit roll-ups I'm surprised my 5 year old hasn't turned into one yet. All in all, it's been a change for the good.  But after this evening's trip, I wish I would have just waltzed in and waltzed out.

It started out like any other normal shopping trip for me.  Even though Meijer associates were out in droves stocking the shelves, only a fraction of my list was actually in-stock.  I meandered my way through the store, nearly barreling over one poor old man when I was thinking too much about laundry detergent and not enough about steering my cart in the right direction.  I missed stuff on my list and had to backtrack several times only to find the items I had backtracked for were out of stock.  I walked down the candy isle 3 times, just staring at the Reece's Peanut Butter Eggs and arguing with myself about how much I didn't NEED them-but WANTED them.

After all my great deals were in the cart, I headed to the self-checkout lane. The first two I went to were updating and not working (why can't they just turn off the little green light above the register so I don't go there??). Luckily the third time was a charm, and I rang up all my great deals and prepared to pay. I reached over to grab my stack of coupons and...they weren't there. Or in my coupon book. Or my purse, the floor, or the other two registers I had tried to check out at. I flew into a panic so insane bystanders may have thought I lost my child, not my coupons.

A poor couple came to wait behind me in line-to which I said "I just lost all of my coupons and I don't know what I'm going to do. I'd find another lane if I were you because I'm going to be a while." Really Sarah? Who does that?!?! As it turned out, the gal running the self check out registers had picked my hefty stack of coupons up from one of the other lanes that I tried to go to. As soon as I saw them, the heavens opened and all was right with the world again. I apologized numerous times to the people behind me in line-and thought about offering to pay for their stuff just to make up for the beast that came out in me.  Then I saw they had enough in their cart to last the next six months, and decided that probably wasn't going to fit in my $50 grocery budget.

So the end of my grocery trip was looking up. The people forgave me, and the girl working the register rocked.  When it was time for me to scan my coupons she just put in her password and brought up the employee screen and left me to my scanning.  It's something that I'm sure her boss would not appreciate, but I did! I walked out feeling relieved and quite glad the whole ordeal was over.  But as one last cruel joke, half way to the car a case of pop fell off the bottom of the cart. Not just anywhere, mind you.  In the MIDDLE of the parking lot, where I had to block traffic to pick it up. And when I went to pick it up, the handle broke.  I repeat: as I was already blocking traffic to pick up said pop case, THE HANDLE BROKE........

Luckily the pop cans didn't fall out and start rolling all over the parking lot.  But because I must have lost the use of most of my brain, I walked away leaving the pop in the middle of parking lot. I wanted to get my cart out of the way and then go back to get the pop since I would need both hands to carry it.  I didn't factor wind into my plan, though, so when the cart started to blow away I was forced to try and stop it with my foot (because I had the pop in my hands). Had I videotaped this I would be $10,000 richer thanks to Funniest Home Videos.

I think I'm done grocery shopping for the week.

If there is someone else out there who has this kind of day occasionally, you are not alone!!!

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